Nov. 5th, 2007

aquarion: (Default)
"Hi there"
"Hello. Who are you?"
"Yeah, I'm your willpower."
"Cool! Haven't seen you in ages. How's it been?"
"Not too good, split up with your self esteem, she said she needed to go out and find herself, I've been a bit down about that."
"Yeah, I've been down recently too."
"Well, yeah. Figures. Anyway, stop distracting me, I can't help notice that the thing in front of you is a cookie"
"So it is!"
"Quite. Now. Do you remember the discussion we had about cookies?"
"They are delicious delicacies and should be savoured whenever you can."
"Ten points from Gryffindor. Cookies are _bad_. cookies mean there is more of us than is strictly necessary. We do not need more cookies."
"But... But... COOKIES!"
"Yes. I'm sure it looks very nice, with the sugar and the white chocolate and the golden brownness and the gooeWILL YOU STOP DROOLING ON MY CARPET?"
"But I've been very good up until now. I deserve the cookie. I've been good."
"You had steak yesterday."
"I've been better than usual."
"It came with chips."
"In my defence, they were very nice chips."
"That's not a defence. That's not even relevant."
"There was salad too!"
"Yes. Half a cow and a cherry tomato. This does not constitute healthy eating, Aquarion."
"But I'd been good all week, and deserved a steak. I'd been looking forward to it. And I had the steak and I haven't slipped up since."
"You ordered dessert."
"Apart from the dessert. I've been good apart from the steak and the dessert. And the cookie."
"What cookie?"
"This cookie."
"You are not eating the cookie. Cookies are bad. Cookies are a sometimes food. DO NOT EAT TH... STOP EATING THE COOKIE."
"Mmmph mmph"
"What?"
*gulp* "And you wanted me to do what with a half-masticated cookie? Half a cookie, even. I only ate a little bit."
"And what are you going to do with the other half of the cookie?"
"I'm going to save it for later."
"And your going to assuage your terrible guilt for eating when you _know_ you shouldn't by doing what exactly? Sports?"
"Does Super Paper Mario count as sports?"
"No. No it doesn't."
"Then I'm going to ignore the guilt. Tasty, Tasty guilt. Mmmm. Guilt"
"And now you've eaten the rest of the cookie. Aquarion?"
"Mmmmph?"
"Please don't ever start smoking."

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aquarion

May 2012

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