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[personal profile] aquarion

"Hi"
"Ah, the new kid. Hi. Welcome to ADSL Resource Support Enablement. Your desk is over here. Don't worry about the drawers, your predecesor took the key with him, we'll get you a new set."
"Why did he leave, incidentally?"
"He died, unfortnately. Lynched by an angry mob."
"Lynched?!"
"In an event entirely unconnected to his work here."
"What is it we do here, anyway? The agency were vague."
"Aha. We disconnect people's ADSL connections."
"Randomly?"
"Well, we used to do it randomly, but that was inefficent - they might not have been using the connections at the time. Then we started disconnecting them at high levels of use, but that became too predictable. So now we watch and wait. See this window?"
"Oh, yes?"
"That's the packet stream from one of our customers, If you look, you can see he's got a high packet transfer rate, but fairly small packets. That looks like a game. Click here and... see? City of Heroes. Now, User Aq2 hasn't been playing this a lot recently, presumably he's been too busy, but now it's christmas and he's got some time to play. So we add an extra bonus to his connection experience. See this? That's the position in the game, apparently about two hours into a team mission. And you can see the fight build up and then... hit that button there."
"The packets have stopped."
"Yup. He now gets to experience a freezeframe of that moment in time until the game realises the connections gone and pings him out. Job well done."
"And they pay us to do this?"
"Well, they pay you. I get a token payment of five pounds a year, mostly why I do this is simply to know that I'm making the world a better place."
"And the customers like this?"
"They wouldn't be using us if they didn't."
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aquarion

May 2012

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